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Date: Sun, 12 Feb 1995 17:30:14 +0000 (GMT)
From: M.G.J.Jenkins[at]-remove-exeter.ac.uk
Subject: The Bishop is back

****JBC ON NET****JBC ON NET****JBC ON NET****JBC ON NET****

To you, unseen aficionados of all things Butch, I send greetings,
bleatings, chidings and tidings. Turner here (in case you hadn't
guessed), with another technomissive from Mission Control. So,
without further ado....

THE NEWS....
The Jazz Butcher Conspiracy's new long player has been titled,
mastered, cut, approved, decorated, roached and smoked. After lengthy
(like, stupidly lengthy) deliberations, the title finally settled
upon is "Illuminate" (which is to be pronounced, in order of
preference, i) as an adjective, like "illiterate", ii) as the Italian
feminine plural of "Illuminati" or, iii) if you simply must, the
obvious way)(see how useful advance information can be.. imagine how
you will be able to laugh at your poorly-advised friends when they
call the record Illumin8 like the bourgeois proles you most certainly
aren't). The discussion was diverted from its original course with
the arrival of Jean-Pierre Loonie's artwork, which features (as
alluded to in "Cute Submarines") candles-a-gogo, and a religious
lunatic from, we are assured, Idaho with rather less sartorial
wherewithal than might be considered...erm... decent. It was this
latter factor which swayed from our original "final" choice of
"Beasts and Superbeasts" for, perhaps a little rarely for the JBC,
taste had to prevail. The mastered version sounds markedly better
than the original mix, a fact for which we are all grateful, and we
now have some hopes for people actually liking this waxing (as Fishy
said to me on the telephone only the other day, it's right up the
Jazz Butcher fan's STUPID street). The final tracklisting (for the
English CD) runs:
A GREAT VISITATION OF ELEPHANTS
SIXTEEN YEARS "Privatised businesses have
* shareholders who expect to make
* financial gain from their stake in
* essential public services infested
* with junior rat-management, and
* PEOPLE WONDER WHERE ALL THE FUCKING
* MONEY'S GONE."
* Whoever compared it to "Excellent"
* wasn't far from the mark, except it's
* markedly less polite.
CUTE SUBMARINES "Here come the little girls with
* candles on their heads."
* A song about dolphins.
LULU'S NIGHTMARE "Cigarettes, beer, ticket, money...
* what could possibly go wrong??"
* What indeed?
BEETLE GEORGE
TRUCK OF FEAR "We're headed for the rubber room
* upon the truck of fear."
* First recorded during the Lovebus
* sessions, this version TRUCKS.
OLD SNAKEY "The unbelievable is always with us."
* A song about gods.
BLUES FOR DEAD DEAN READ "Trinken wir alle zusammen, morgen
* morgen ist jedermann tot."
* The conclusion of the JBC series of
* "folk music from an imaginary
* country" (copyright C.V.Beethoven),
* a la Basement and Monkeyfaeces.
* Features Mister Alex Lee on God duty.
WHEN ENO SINGS "Dome-heads everywhere can throw
* their hats into the air when Eno
* sings."
* Self-explanatory tribute song with
* more than a hint of Ghosts about it.
WAITING FOR SUMO "Somebody better come see about
* Dooj."
* A song about a rotweiler.
THE UGLIEST SONG IN THE WORLD "No thought, no system but, God! what
* a wealth of feeling."
* Vicious, vicious, vicious. If Gerard
* Langley was Mark E Smith, there would
* be bloodshed when this one gets out.
SCARLETT "Look me in the eyes, and tell me
* no-one will remember your name."
* A bona fide gem. Kinda like the best
* bits of Girls Say Yes mixed with the
* best bits of Whaddya. I love this
* one.
COPS AND HOSPITALS "We don't want to fight for a normal
* life... life's too short, and so are
* you."
* Working title: "The Big Dumb Manc
* Thing". Guitars, shouting... the
* usual shit.
SURF GEAR IN IDAHO "We need a stong man's hand, we need
* a North/Quayle ticket."
* Token art misery number. Pat HATES
* it, no-one else does.
LAND "At night, the only light comes from
* the stars."
* A song about dinosaurs.
TRUE STORIES "...will have to do."
* Coda.

All this will be released (in England) on March 20th. This will be
preceded by the single (Sixteen Years) on March 6th. ENJOY.

GIGS:
11th March Somewhere in Rugby, Warks.
23rd March The Borderline, London.
* (We're looking forward to this one, the last one there
* ROCKED.)
1st April Nene College, Northampton.
April and May EUROPE. The gigs are coming in for what might well
become quite an extensive tour. So far we have dates in France,
Norway and Portugal. We'd better get a few more, or we'll have a bit
of driving to do.

Miscelaneous shit:
Whoever said we don't ever play Ghosts anymore was fibbing, however
Sweet Water does seem to have been dropped, and Whaddya never really
made it in the first place.
McGee assures us that Sixteen Years WILL get airplay. We can hope.
We spent last weekend making a promo video for same. Much shouting.
Much smoking. Unlikely to be broadcastable.

Gigs you're missing info on:
Bristol, Fleece, 26th July 1994
A completely futile but largely pleasant outing. I'm not sure anybody
in the audience wasn't known to the band... including large Blue
Aeroplanes and Strangelove delegations. The Aeroplanes contingent
observed quietly, scratched their chins and pronounced the
performance fairly distinguished. Strangelove reached a similar
conclusion by way of the (altogether nobler) method of getting so
slaughtered that they couldn't tell anyway. Perhaps the most notable
moment of the evening was when the JBC, displaying a spontaneity and
confidence rarely seen in these parts, decided that Caroline
Wheeler's Birthday Present would be a good choice of second encore...
despite the fact that the drummer had never played it and the lead
guitarist had never heard it. Triumphantly, no-one noticed.
Set (from memory): Rosemary Davis World of Sound, Bakersfield, Mr
Odd, She's On Drugs, Our Friends The Filth, Camper Van Monkeyface,
Sister Death, She's a Yo-yo, Ghosts, Shirley Maclaine, President
Chang......Partytime, Take the Skinheads Bowling.....Caroline
Wheeler's Birthday Present.

Cambridge, Boatrace, Septemberish.
The best this line up of the JBC has ever played in terms of
precision, though not the best performance on account of how well
ventilated the audience was. Nothing much else to report.
Set: as Bristol, but no encores.

London, Mean Fiddler, December 18th.
Supporting the (woeful, do NOT believe your contributor) Blue
Aeroplanes at their Tenth Anniversary/Christmas celebrations, a JBC
contingent played three tunes; two new ones, and one by trusty
sidekick Curtis E. Johnson . One number, Scarlett, featured Gabriel's
debut as JBC lead guitarist. As with every Aeroplanes gig, a jolly
good rider was had by all.
Personnel: Pat and Gabriel
Set: Thought for the Day, Scarlett, Cute Submarines.

Northampton, Slurps, December 21st.
Christmas. New tunes. Absurd polarities of cold (courtesy of the
weather) and heat (courtesy of the industrial flamethrower hired in).
Nearly no P.A. Yes, that's right, we had a scream.
Set: A Great Visitation of Elephants, Sixteen Years, Our Friends the
Filth, She's On Drugs, When Eno Sings, Waiting for Sumo, Ghosts, Cute
Submarines, President Chang.....Take the Skinheads Bowling, Caroline
Wheeler's Birthday Present.

ENOUGH ALREADY

Before I go, I wanted to enquire as to the feasibility of a more
extensive JBC survey being attached to the Web site (prompting for
favourite songs, albums, gigs, light refreshments etc. etc... you
know the score). If this is possible, then I would find that sort of
worthless trivia fascinating, and I'm sure my comrades would as well.
It's just a thought... if you like it, then we will conference about
possible categories at some point in the future.

Sorry this communique is so abbreviated in style... I had a lot to
write, okay? And now my fingers hurt, so I'm going home.

Snuggles,

The Bishop.

P.S. The correct spelling is: jdete pryc