What is happening to my self-respect?
Tear out my hair I wish they'd shut down the mail.
Lift up the lid and to my great surprise
There was unwanted evil aliens in my garbage pail.
And it's hard hard hard hard
To get out of bed (when you get weather)
Yes it's hard hard hard hard
To get fed - you get stuffed instead

Esther from Leicester made a big mistake
She put a fake baked snake in her boyfriend's cake
And when the time came to blow out the candles
She couldn't see it when he flew off the handle
He said "all that time, I've got to get out of here
Don't need a public service love affair where nothing is clear
I've seen the light and I've got the address
I've got to run run run run run until I'm out of this mess"
And it's hard hard hard hard
To get on the train (when you're in love)
Yes it's hard hard hard hard
To explain (when you're in love)
Goes like this...

So now I'm running up and down in the street
It's the middle of the winter and these shoes hurt my feet
You mess up all my dreams and you won't let me sleep
You're the one I've got to have so don't dismiss me as sweet
But good grief what a squalid affair
What a round about division of my own devising
I'm so decrepit my condition's unfair
But if you live the life I'm living then it isn't surprising
And it's hard hard hard hard to get on the train (when you're in love)
Oh it's hard hard hard hard to explain (when you're in love)
And it's hard hard hard hard to get on the train
And it's hard hard hard hard to explain
Yes it's hard hard hard hard to stand on your feet
Yes it's hard hard hard hard...